TANGERINE DREAMS

Let the backlash begin. Everyone loved her last night. How's Maureen Dowd this morning, a little cranky?

Here's Andrew Sullivan:

"She started out a little dull and a little self-obsessed. But then she rallied - a little. "No Way. No How. No McCain" was a good line. And the Twin Cities analogy was a great little riff on Bush and McCain. But I have to say her speaking style, although much improved over even a year ago, is still a little flat. When she's passionate, she has little inflection. When she's quieter, she's a little drony. The "keep going" theme, moreover, was a little unnerving. A thinly veiled threat?"

Well if that was a threat it wasn't very 'thinly veiled'. And what sort of threat is that exactly? That she has a rifle in her pants? Well she does but not a real one.

Sullivan has nothing more to say though, "But actually, I don't have much more to say."

Except this: "The response on television from the crowd seems to have been everything Obama would have wanted. To my mind, however, it was an average performance, not a slashing attack on the Bush-Cheney record, nor a rousing rallying cry for Obama, nor a very insightful analysis of the country's problems. There was virtually nothing about foreign policy. She did what she had to do, tell her voters to back Obama. But she gave nothing more."

What a little bitch he is, what is she supposed to bleed all over the convention floor?

"So far, only Michelle Obama has rescued this convention from being dreary and distracted."

I agree it's been dreary, but isn't everything before the Messiah comes?

I AM HARVEY

Sean Penn sodomizing Harvey Milk in an upcoming biopic.

photo: Us Magazine

COLDPOO OF THE DAY

Whenever he sings, "That was when I ruled the world," my mind sings, "That was when I was a girl." Why is that? Stop enunciating your lyrics at me! I hear them, I hear them!!

SINEWY & SCARY & STICKY & STUPID TOUR

Her vagina must be so hot! Here's Madonna airing it out in Wales, kicking off her tour in several tight muscleman poses. During the song, "Get Stupid", she flashed images that have 'outraged' the McCain camp.

Per Huffington Post:

"As Madonna kicked off her international "Sticky and Sweet" tour Saturday night, she took a none-too subtle swipe at the presumptive Republican nominee for U.S. president.

Amid a four-act show at Cardiff's packed Millennium Stadium, a video interlude carried images of destruction, global warming, Nazi dictator Adolf Hitler, Zimbabwe's authoritarian President Robert Mugabe _ and U.S. Senator John McCain. Another sequence, shown later, pictured slain Beatle John Lennon, followed by climate activist Al Gore, Mahatma Gandhi and finally McCain's Democratic rival Barack Obama."

So, according to Yahoo News,the McCain camp is fighting back, I guess, in an old-timer-sort of way:

"The comparisons are outrageous, unacceptable and crudely divisive all at the same time," Bounds said in a statement reported by Fox News. "It clearly shows that when it comes to supporting Barack Obama, his fellow worldwide celebrities refuse to consider any smear or attack off limits."

That's true but then they added: 'Get off my lawn, you you you little bastards!'

Just joshin'.

Will Madonna ever give up Marlene Dietrich? Sorry, but Madonna trying to be controversial at this point is just sadness. Steroid sadness.

MORE NAKED DRAMA

According to the Belleville Intelligencer:

"Robertson's plane went down in the woods north of Bancroft early Sunday afternoon. "Everyone is fine and that is the important thing," said Adam Smith, a spokesman for the band. "That's all the comment we have at this time."

A police spokesperson added a few more details.

They say, "At 12:30 p.m. a Cessna 206 was taking off from Baptiste Lake, lost airspeed and entered a wooded area west of the lake." He said the plane was totaled but all four adults managed to walk out of the woods and soon reported the crash."

Whew! Now if Steven Page has the same kind of luck regarding his upcoming court date, Canada will be carefully tactful (with a grain of salty cynicism) and genteel once again.

AHHHH!!

Dick extrodinaire, Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder. Scary bitch.

NOTE: Sorry, video is gone. Knew the fat Hollywood bastards would get rid of it. You're going to have to pay to see that shit, but be sure and swipe a dollar from the Children's Charity collection box on the counter, because you should get money back from having to watch that monkey bitch.

MIDNIGHT ASSWIPE

Jon Voight responds to Roseanne's blog---a surprisingly sharp take on everything, read it here if you haven't.

So, as per Just Jared, Jon Voight responds, missing the mark, offensive as usual:

"We can never be surprised at what vile evil comes from the mouth of a confessed victim of child abuse at the hands of her own parents. Her parents responded to the accusation by going on the air and slating she is a psychopathic liar and her sister agreed. Her defaming of our National Anthem in 1990 gave us insight into who she is and what she is capable of saying and doing. My allegiance to Senator McCain becomes stronger with any assault that tries to deter my loyalty to him. I can only pray that good people see her for what she is (sick of mind)."

So which is it? Is she a victim of child abuse, accounting for the 'vile evil' coming from her mouth, or is she a psychopathic liar? And he just blindly supports McCain, any assault making him more loyal? Is McCain his wife or a political candidate? And didn't he support Guiliani at the start of the race?

Now, Voight is very good at calling out women who are 'sick of mind'. Causing the rift that still exists between himself and his daughter. Years ago, after speaking to the press, revealing private details, Jolie legally changed her name to "Angelina Jolie". Voight had claimed that his daughter has "serious emotional problems" on Access Hollywood.

Voight/Jolie photo: PopSugar

THE ONE-EYED DOG IS QUEEN

Selma Blair is hot and she has a one-eyed dog.
And a hot boyfriend, Matthew Felker, who's a 'writer' and a model-actor who kisses Britney Spears in her "Toxic" video:

He doesn't look contaminated at all.


Thanks to People and Hollywood Grind

BLACK LIKE ME

Is that what Jen had to look at in bed? Ick. John Mayer, who Jennifer Aniston just dumped. Or he dumped. Whatever. Conflicting stories. Does she know what he said in Rolling Stone?:

"Everyone thinks Brad Pitt has it great because he married Angelina Jolie. I think he has it terrible, because when Angelina Jolie is giving you a blow job, what do you tip your head back and think of to help you finish? You have nothing left — just Jesus on a polar bear in the middle of the snow, saying, 'You greedy motherfucker, I've got nothing for you.'"

Oh he's so funny. Is anyone tipping their head back thinking of friendly Jennifer Aniston? Maybe this is what sealed the deal:

"I'm not worried about how small my penis is — I'm worried about how dark it is. I have a Dominican penis. My penis hit six home runs last year; my penis wears shoes without socks."

Mayer as Borat photo: Ask a Gay Man

LINGERING

Obama's set to announce his Veep pick this Wednesday, and Patrick Healy revives (even as a longshot) the long-dead hopes Hillary might be the choice.

Okay, so it's probably going to be one of two B's-- Joe Biden (he of the impeccable credentials and pecked-at hair plugs), or Evan Bayh (he of-- what? Indiana. He can deliver Indiana!). But even the idea of Hillary once again part of the race, bringing some depth and fire to the tediousness of Obama-McCain-- and not that I want it, girl is all set for '12 or even '16-- I'm so hungry for someone real and compelling, I would get down on my knees and suck Obama's purple lipstick, and even the pulsating, vascular sausage of Michelle, should they deign to recognize the rest of us not blinded (and now aghast) at the empty rhetoric and limp-wristed responses of Camp Obama.

DON'T DROP THE SOAP

"Yes, Dan Radcliffe does have dyspraxia. This is something he has never hidden. Thankfully his condition is very mild and at worst manifests itself in an inability to tie his shoelaces and bad handwriting.

I guess he could always cast a spell to retrieve the soap, and spare the audience a peep at his hairy pooper. He saves that for his Chamberpot of Secretions.

HEARTBREAK PRESCRIPTION FROM DR. COOKIE

Big Hair? What about big butt? What the hell happened to Alanis?

Jesus Christ, girl must really be in the dumps after breaking up with Ryan Reynolds-- either that, or she's so pissed at him she threw out all her Reynolds Wrap, and now insists on finishing everything on her plate. No leftovers for Alanis! She'll finish everything on your plate too.

Watch out, Ryan, your day of infamy is coming, like Dave Coulier's in "You Ought'a Know." It's the Alanis curse-- she writes an angry, bitter litany of your faults, and the song goes on the great fame, while your fame diminishes! Diminishing returns!

Look out for Alanis' new hip-hop/pop cross-over hit (sung at the piano, of course), "Reynolds Rap."