AW, SHUCKS

Camille Paglia is nuts. From Salon:

And where is all that lurid sexual fantasy coming from? When I watch Sarah Palin, I don't think sex -- I think Amazon warrior! I admire her competitive spirit and her exuberant vitality, which borders on the supernormal. The question that keeps popping up for me is whether Palin, who was born in Idaho, could possibly be part Native American (as we know her husband is), which sometimes seems suggested by her strong facial contours. I have felt that same extraordinary energy and hyper-alertness billowing out from other women with Native American ancestry -- including two overpowering celebrity icons with whom I have worked.

One of the most idiotic allegations batting around out there among urban media insiders is that Palin is "dumb." Are they kidding? What level of stupidity is now par for the course in those musty circles? (The value of Ivy League degrees, like sub-prime mortgages, has certainly been plummeting. As a Yale Ph.D., I have a perfect right to my scorn.) People who can't see how smart Palin is are trapped in their own narrow parochialism -- the tedious, hackneyed forms of their upper-middle-class syntax and vocabulary.

and

Even if she disappears from the scene forever after a McCain defeat, Palin will still have made an enormous and lasting contribution to feminism. As I said in my last column, Palin has made the biggest step forward in reshaping the persona of female authority since Madonna danced her dominatrix way through the shattered puritan barricades of the feminist establishment. In 1990, in a highly controversial New York Times op-ed that attacked old-guard feminist ideology, I declared that "Madonna is the future of feminism" -- a prophecy that was ridiculed at the time but that turned out to be quite true. Madonna put pro-sex feminism on the international map.

But it is now 18 years later -- the span of an entire generation. The instabilities and diminishments for young women raised in an increasingly shallow media environment have become all too obvious. I had grown up in a vibrant pop culture with glorious women stars of voluptuous sensuality -- above all Elizabeth Taylor, sewn into that silky white slip as the vixen Manhattan call girl of "Butterfield 8."

I agree. If I hadn't seen 'Butterfield 8', I wouldn't be the wearing the slip I'm wearing today.

Camille is so transparent. She only likes the girls she wants to fuck. If you're pretty and you crave attention and you're a woman, you rule! She's like my insane friend who screams "Queen!" in a movie theatre whenever her favourite actresses appear on screen. Screen scream queen-- say that 3 times fast!

I guess Katie Couric is too demure and eyelash-batting, she's not frenetic enough to get Camille's favour. Oh, I mean, she's a viper, no explanation necessary! I guess I'll have to search through all my Camille backlogs to find where she tells us-- or maybe it's in one of her controversial and provocative best-selling books, or one of her award-winning and culturally-prescient articles?

About Palin's syntax-- well, I agree with breaking grammar rules or using the local vernacular, but there's also breaking grammar rules and using vernacular in a way you can understand. I have another friend (yes, SO many friends!) who just talks and talks to fill up air, the way Sarah does.

But she's my friend, and she's not explaining the course our friendship will take over the next four years, the way she'll be using the money she collects from me, the improvements she'll be making to my environment (including a fabulous conversation piece in my living room, the staircase to nowhere), as well as how she means to take care of me when I'm sick or when I retire. Maybe then I'd sit up and pay attention, parse her conversation style for obfuscations, raise my eyebrows when I detect she's laying on the bullshit-- just as we should do with Sarah Palin.