PRETTYRNITY SUIT

Or, the Edwards Affhair.

Now that John Edwards has finally admitted his liaison with Rielle Hunter (while his wife was battling cancer-- although it was in remission-- "how thoughtful of you to wait, honey!"), the issue turns to the father of Hunter's son, born in February. Edwards claims that a former campaign aide, Andrew Young, was the father of the baby. What, the slut just jumps on the campaign bus and starts humping her way to the back? It was reported in the Enquirer that, in an attempt to hush the two up, both Hunter and Young have been put up in multi-million dollar homes. Something smells fishy!

Edwards says he'll do whatever it takes to prove he's not the father. DNA test? Sure. But the true test for Edwards offspring would normally be the comb-and-mirror test. Put little baby Doe (still don't know the name) in front of a mirror with a comb and hairspray, and see him go to town. This test, unfortunately, has been complicated by the inferior hairstyling gene of the mother. Check out that hair-don't! It's called the "Tousled Salad."

Back to the DNA test then-- both should test positive for a full "aquanet" strand.

Here's the Youtube video-- can't seem to get it to post