Monday, August 18, 2008

OUCH!


WHICH hunk in a summer movie is a violent, closeted homosexual? The heartthrob snuck into his ex's apartment a few months ago and raped him so violently, the ex ended up in the hospital - and the actor paid him $500,000 to keep his mouth shut (Page Six)

I'm thinking it's Robert Downey Jr. He already said he wanted to fuck Batman, or something. Besides, he's been in prison. "ex" means "ex-cellmate." Together, they rigged up an iron condom, and Bob was just paying for his share of the patent license and testing it out. They just gotta do something about those sharp edges.

Above, he's showing off his new "fisting condom." With handy searchlight, for that unmistakable inner glow. What's his secret? Only the boys of cellblock 8 know for sure!

via dlisted

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