Come hungry. Leave Happy. The girls of Delta Gamma want to adopt the IHOP slogan as their own! Oh, it looks innocent to the parents reading the Delta Gamma blog, but the boys on campus know the DG house is the place to go while they're washing their splodge rags at the campus laundrymat. No fuss, no muss, it's the girls of Delta Gamma! Better way to pass the time than reading an old US Magazine with a bald Britney cover while you're watching the clothes go 'round.
Shouldn't the term "come hungry" be retired along with the term "gay" for "merry"? No, not "Mary." Maybe-- "festive?" Dammit, those gaylords ruin everything! While we're at it, what genius devised the "Bayer Back & Body" campaign? You just know it was a big old Queen with an anti-safe-sex agenda. It's the perfect alibi if you're too damn cheap to go to the pharmacy for condoms. When things start to get intimate, just say you need a Bayer Back & Body, and your trick will think he better not wriggle too much while he's sitting on your face. When he gets his positive tests back-- for herpes (or whatever), you can reply, "well, I did say I need a bare backin' buddy!" You'll be home free!
Come on, you get it. Say it out loud. "Bayer Back & Body." And for those not hip to gay parlance-- riding "Bareback" means without a saddle. Like "Bareback Mountain." Keep up, grandma.
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